{"id":488,"date":"2016-09-21T00:44:52","date_gmt":"2016-09-21T04:44:52","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/techrhet.com\/3213\/?page_id=488"},"modified":"2016-09-21T00:44:52","modified_gmt":"2016-09-21T04:44:52","slug":"conciseness-strategies-1-5","status":"publish","type":"page","link":"https:\/\/techrhet.com\/3213\/conciseness-strategies-1-5\/","title":{"rendered":"Conciseness: Strategies 1-5"},"content":{"rendered":"<div class=\"stickmenu2\" style=\"font-size: 130%; padding-bottom: 4px;\"><a id=\"top\"><\/a>conciseness strategies: <a href=\"#intro\">intro<\/a> | <a href=\"#fillers\">fillers<\/a> | <a href=\"#circumlocutions\">circumlocutions<\/a> | <a href=\"#canned\">canned phrases<\/a> | <a href=\"#starters\">sentence starters<\/a> | <a href=\"#passive\">passive voice<\/a><\/div>\n<h5>Introduction \/ Overview<\/h5>\n<p>Unlike some other kinds of writing such as poetry or fiction, business writing is not an opportunity for self-expression. Instead it calls for a fairly conservative and unadorned style. Writing style, also known as voice or tone, is the manner in which a writer addresses the reader. It involves qualities of writing such as word choice (vocabulary and diction); grammar and syntax; sentence length, structure, and order (cohesion); and paragraph length, organization, and arrangement (coherence).<\/p>\n<p>There was a time when many business documents were written in third person to give them the impression of objectivity. This formal style was often passive, wordy, and loaded with empty phrases and unnecessarily complex words, perhaps to give them the impression of authority. Today, good business writing is clear, concise, correct, and courteous. Business writers aim for a readable, conversational style using plain English and active verbs.<\/p>\n<p>During the semester, this course material will present various strategies to improve the readability and clarity of your professional writing, loosely organized around achieving those objectives &#8212; clarity, concision, correctness, and courteousness. You&#8217;ve already read about courteousness (you-atttitude, reader-centered writing, courteous genre conventions, etc.), and in the future, you&#8217;ll read about clarity and correctness.<\/p>\n<p>Today, it&#8217;s all about being concise.<\/p>\n<div style=\"display: block; text-align: right; margin-top: -1em;\"><span class=\"arrowtop\" style=\"font-size: 150%; opacity: 0.5;\"><a href=\"#top\">\u2b06<\/a><\/span><\/div>\n<h5>Conciseness<\/h5>\n<p>Conciseness means getting rid of every word that serves no function. Concise writing:<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li style=\"padding-bottom: 4px;\">gets to the point,<\/li>\n<li style=\"padding-bottom: 4px;\">avoids unnecessary repetition and wordy expressions,<\/li>\n<li style=\"padding-bottom: 4px;\">Includes only relevant facts (with courtesy), and<\/li>\n<li>uses everyday, conversational speech.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>A concise message saves time and expense for both sender and receiver. Avoiding wordiness means using the fewest number of words possible to express your ideas. The benefits of being concise are<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li style=\"padding-bottom: 4px;\">the reader can see your main ideas easily the first time,<\/li>\n<li style=\"padding-bottom: 4px;\">your main points stand out, and<\/li>\n<li>it saves time, effort, and money.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>Conciseness in professional writing style <em><strong>doesn&#8217;t <\/strong><\/em>mean simply reducing the number of words or making a document shorter. It means eliminating <strong><em>unnecessary<\/em><\/strong> words. Words are unnecessary if they don&#8217;t contribute to your meaning, appeal to your audience (using a reader-centered approach), or help you accomplish your purpose.<\/p>\n<p>You&#8217;ll have to make conscious decisions about which words, details, and ideas are necessary (useful, beneficial, and rhetorical) and which are unnecessary (canned, counterproductive, and careless). Consider the sentences below.<\/p>\n<table class=\" aligncenter\" style=\"border-collapse: separate; margin-top: -15px; margin-bottom:5px; padding-left: 30px;\" border=\"0\" cellspacing=\"10\">\n<tbody>\n<tr>\n<td style=\"padding-left: 15px; border-bottom: none;\" bgcolor=\"#ffebee\" width=\"50%\">Your tickets will arrive soon.<\/td>\n<td style=\"padding-left: 15px; border-bottom: none;\" bgcolor=\"#E8F5E9\" width=\"50%\">Your section 4, row 3, tickets will arrive by Fed Ex before noon tomorrow.<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<\/tbody>\n<\/table>\n<div class=\"clear\"><\/div>\n<p>If you bought tickets to an event, what would you want to know? Which sentence would you prefer? Although the first sentence is shorter, the second includes information the reader is likely to want.<\/p>\n<p>For that reason, while this course material will focus on guidelines for concise writing, it&#8217;s your responsibility to decide whether individual sentences break and &#8220;rules,&#8221; whether information is important to the audience and your purpose, and ultimately, whether or not to revise to make those sentences more concise.<\/p>\n<p>Be meticulous. Examine every word and phrase, and make conscious rhetorical decisions about writing, revision, and editing.<\/p>\n<div style=\"display: block; text-align: right; margin-top: -1em;\"><span class=\"arrowtop\" style=\"font-size: 150%; opacity: 0.5;\"><a href=\"#top\">\u2b06<\/a><\/span><\/div>\n<h1 style=\"margin-bottom:20px; text-align:center;\">5 Conciseness Strategies:<\/h1>\n<p><span id=\"fillers\" class=\"anchor\"><\/span><\/p>\n<div style=\"display: inline-block; width: 100%; border-top:3px solid #E0E0E0;\">\n<div style=\"font-family: 'Roboto'; font-size: 80%; padding-left: 12px; color: #ef9a9a; letter-spacing: 1px;\">CONCISENESS STRATEGY #1<\/div>\n<div style=\"border-radius: 5px; background: #ffebee; padding: 5px 12px; margin: 0 0 20px;\">\n<div style=\"font-family: 'Roboto Slab'; font-size: 180%; border-bottom: 2px solid #ffffff; padding: 5px 0 8px;\">Remove Empty Fillers<\/div>\n<div style=\"font-family: 'Roboto'; font-size: 110%; font-weight: 300; padding-left: 30px; padding-top: 2px;\">get rid of the junk that&#8217;s weighing down your prose<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<p>Writers sometimes clog up their prose with one or more extra words or phrases that seem to determine narrowly or to modify the meaning of a noun but don&#8217;t actually add to the meaning of the sentence. Although such words and phrases can be meaningful in the appropriate context, they are often used as &#8220;filler&#8221; and can easily be eliminated.<\/p>\n<p style=\"font-weight:500;\">Avoid these common fillers: kind of, sort of, type of, really, basically, definitely, actually, generally&#8230;<\/p>\n<table style=\"border-collapse: separate; width: 96%; margin: -10px auto 0;\" border=\"0\" cellspacing=\"10\" align=\"center\">\n<tbody>\n<tr>\n<td style=\"width: 50%; border-bottom: none; text-align: center; font-size: 130%; font-weight: 300; padding: 0;\">WORDY<\/td>\n<td style=\"width: 50%; border-bottom: none; text-align: center; font-size: 130%; font-weight: 300; padding: 0;\">CONCISE<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td style=\"padding: 5px 10px; border-bottom: none;\" bgcolor=\"#ffebee\">Any <strong>particular type of<\/strong> dessert is fine with me.<\/td>\n<td style=\"padding: 5px 10px; border-bottom: none;\" bgcolor=\"#E8F5E9\">Any dessert is fine with me.<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td style=\"padding: 5px 10px; border-bottom: none;\" rowspan=\"2\" bgcolor=\"#ffebee\">Balancing the budget by Friday is an impossibility without <strong>some kind of <\/strong>extra help.<\/td>\n<td style=\"padding: 5px 10px; border-bottom: none;\" bgcolor=\"#E8F5E9\">Balancing the budget by Friday is impossible without extra help.<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td style=\"padding: 5px 10px; border-bottom: none;\" bgcolor=\"#E8F5E9\">We need help to balance the budget by Friday.<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td style=\"padding: 5px 10px; border-bottom: none;\" bgcolor=\"#ffebee\"><strong>For all intents and purposes<\/strong>, American industrial productivity <strong>generally<\/strong> depends on <strong>certain<\/strong> factors that are <strong>really<\/strong> more psychological <strong>in kind <\/strong>than of <strong>any given<\/strong> technological aspect.<\/td>\n<td style=\"padding: 5px 10px; border-bottom: none;\" bgcolor=\"#E8F5E9\">American industrial productivity depends more on psychological than on technological factors.<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<\/tbody>\n<\/table>\n<p><span id=\"circumlocutions\" class=\"anchor\"><\/span><\/p>\n<div style=\"display: block; text-align: right; margin-top: 0;\"><span class=\"arrowtop\" style=\"font-size: 150%; opacity: 0.5;\"><a href=\"#top\">\u2b06<\/a><\/span><\/div>\n<div style=\"display: inline-block; width: 100%;\">\n<div style=\"font-family: 'Roboto'; font-size: 80%; padding-left: 12px; color: #F48FB1; letter-spacing: 1px; margin-top: 40px; border-top:3px solid #E0E0E0;\">CONCISENESS STRATEGY #2<\/div>\n<div style=\"border-radius: 5px; background: #FCE4EC; padding: 5px 12px; margin: 0 0 20px;\">\n<div style=\"font-family: 'Roboto Slab'; font-size: 180%; border-bottom: 2px solid #ffffff; padding: 5px 0 8px;\">Avoid Circumlocutions<\/div>\n<div style=\"font-family: 'Roboto'; font-size: 110%; font-weight: 300; padding-left: 30px; padding-top: 2px;\">use <em>words<\/em>; not <em>phrases<\/em><\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<p>Circumlocution is using a phrase to convey meaning that could be presented in a single word.\u00a0 They are often roundabout expressions that take several words to say what could be said more succinctly. We often overlook them because many such expressions are habitual figures of speech. In writing, though, they should be avoided since they add extra words without extra meaning. Of course, occasionally you may for rhetorical effect decide to use, say, an expletive construction instead of a more succinct expression.<\/p>\n<p>In general and when possible, to avoid wordiness, convert phrases into single words.<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li style=\"padding-bottom: 4px;\"><em>in close proximity<\/em> = near<\/li>\n<li style=\"padding-bottom: 4px;\"><em>despite the fact that<\/em> = although<\/li>\n<li style=\"padding-bottom: 4px;\"><em>outside the realm of possibility <\/em>= impossible<\/li>\n<li style=\"padding-bottom: 4px;\"><em>at this point in time <\/em>= now<\/li>\n<li style=\"padding-bottom: 4px;\"><em>in accordance with your request <\/em>= as you requested<\/li>\n<li style=\"padding-bottom: 4px;\"><em>is contingent upon <\/em>= depends<\/li>\n<li style=\"padding-bottom: 4px;\"><em>subsequent to<\/em> = after<\/li>\n<li><em>aware of the fact<\/em> = know<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<table class=\" aligncenter\" style=\"border-collapse: separate; width: 90%;\" border=\"0\" cellspacing=\"10\">\n<tbody>\n<tr>\n<td style=\"border-bottom: none; padding-left: 10px;\" bgcolor=\"#ffebee\" width=\"28%\">\n<div class=\"tablelist\">\u2022\u00a0\u00a0 the reason for<\/div>\n<div class=\"tablelist\">\u2022\u00a0 due to the fact that<\/div>\n<div class=\"tablelist\">\u2022\u00a0\u00a0in light of the fact that<\/div>\n<div class=\"tablelist\">\u2022\u00a0\u00a0considering the fact that<\/div>\n<div class=\"tablelist\">\u2022\u00a0\u00a0on the grounds that<\/div>\n<\/td>\n<td style=\"vertical-align: middle; font-size: 125%; padding-left: 5px !important; border-bottom: none;\" align=\"center\" bgcolor=\"#E8F5E9\" width=\"20%\">because, since, why<\/td>\n<td style=\"vertical-align: middle; font-size: 125%; border-bottom: none;\" align=\"center\" width=\"2%\"><\/td>\n<td style=\"border-bottom: none; padding-left: 10px;\" align=\"left\" bgcolor=\"#ffebee\" width=\"28%\">\n<div class=\"tablelist\">\u2022\u00a0\u00a0as regards<\/div>\n<div class=\"tablelist\">\u2022\u00a0\u00a0in reference to<\/div>\n<div class=\"tablelist\">\u2022\u00a0\u00a0with regard to<\/div>\n<div class=\"tablelist\">\u2022\u00a0\u00a0concerning the matter of<\/div>\n<div class=\"tablelist\">\u2022\u00a0\u00a0where ___ is concerned<\/div>\n<\/td>\n<td style=\"vertical-align: middle; font-size: 125%; padding-left: 5px !important; border-bottom: none;\" align=\"center\" bgcolor=\"#E8F5E9\" width=\"20%\">about<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td style=\"border-bottom: none; padding-left: 10px;\" bgcolor=\"#ffebee\" width=\"28%\">\n<div class=\"tablelist\">\u2022\u00a0\u00a0it is crucial that<\/div>\n<div class=\"tablelist\">\u2022\u00a0\u00a0it is necessary that<\/div>\n<div class=\"tablelist\">\u2022\u00a0\u00a0it&#8217;s a necessity for<\/div>\n<div class=\"tablelist\">\u2022\u00a0\u00a0it is important<\/div>\n<\/td>\n<td style=\"vertical-align: middle; font-size: 125%; padding-left: 5px !important; border-bottom: none;\" align=\"center\" bgcolor=\"#E8F5E9\" width=\"20%\">must, should<\/td>\n<td style=\"border-bottom: none;\" align=\"center\" width=\"2%\"><\/td>\n<td style=\"border-bottom: none; padding-left: 10px;\" align=\"left\" bgcolor=\"#ffebee\" width=\"28%\">\n<div class=\"tablelist\">\u2022\u00a0\u00a0is able to<\/div>\n<div class=\"tablelist\">\u2022\u00a0\u00a0has the opportunity to<\/div>\n<div class=\"tablelist\">\u2022\u00a0\u00a0has the capacity for<\/div>\n<div class=\"tablelist\">\u2022\u00a0\u00a0has the ability to<\/div>\n<\/td>\n<td style=\"vertical-align: middle; font-size: 125%; padding-left: 5px !important; border-bottom: none;\" align=\"center\" bgcolor=\"#E8F5E9\" width=\"20%\">can<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td style=\"border-bottom: none; padding-left: 10px;\" bgcolor=\"#ffebee\" width=\"28%\">\n<div class=\"tablelist\">\u2022\u00a0\u00a0there is a chance that<\/div>\n<div class=\"tablelist\">\u2022\u00a0 is it possible that<\/div>\n<div class=\"tablelist\">\u2022\u00a0 it could happen that<\/div>\n<div class=\"tablelist\">\u2022\u00a0 the possibility exists for<\/div>\n<\/td>\n<td style=\"vertical-align: middle; font-size: 125%; padding-left: 5px !important; border-bottom: none;\" align=\"center\" bgcolor=\"#E8F5E9\" width=\"20%\">may, might, could<\/td>\n<td style=\"vertical-align: middle; font-size: 125%; border-bottom: none;\" align=\"center\" width=\"2%\"><\/td>\n<td style=\"border-bottom: none; padding-left: 10px;\" align=\"left\" bgcolor=\"#ffebee\" width=\"28%\">\n<div class=\"tablelist\">\u2022\u00a0\u00a0on the occasion of<\/div>\n<div class=\"tablelist\">\u2022\u00a0\u00a0in a situation which<\/div>\n<div class=\"tablelist\">\u2022\u00a0\u00a0under circumstances in which<\/div>\n<\/td>\n<td style=\"border-bottom: none;\" align=\"center\" bgcolor=\"#E8F5E9\" width=\"20%\">when<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<\/tbody>\n<\/table>\n<table style=\"border-collapse: separate; width: 96%; margin: 30px auto 0;\" border=\"0\" cellspacing=\"10\" align=\"center\">\n<tbody>\n<tr>\n<td style=\"width: 50%; border-bottom: none; text-align: center; font-size: 130%; font-weight: 300; padding: 0;\">WORDY<\/td>\n<td style=\"width: 50%; border-bottom: none; text-align: center; font-size: 130%; font-weight: 300; padding: 0;\">CONCISE<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td style=\"border-bottom: none; padding-left: 15px;\" bgcolor=\"#ffebee\">The <strong>employee with ambition\u2026<\/strong><\/td>\n<td style=\"border-bottom: none; padding-left: 15px;\" bgcolor=\"#E8F5E9\">The ambitious employee\u2026<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td style=\"border-bottom: none; padding-left: 15px;\" bgcolor=\"#ffebee\">The department <strong>showing the best performance&#8230;<\/strong><\/td>\n<td style=\"border-bottom: none; padding-left: 15px;\" bgcolor=\"#E8F5E9\">The best-performing department&#8230;<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td style=\"border-bottom: none; padding-left: 15px;\" bgcolor=\"#ffebee\"><strong>Following the presentation<\/strong> of his speech\u2026<\/td>\n<td style=\"border-bottom: none; padding-left: 15px;\" bgcolor=\"#E8F5E9\">After his speech\u2026<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td style=\"border-bottom: none; padding-left: 15px;\" bgcolor=\"#ffebee\">The report, <strong>which was released recently&#8230;<\/strong><\/td>\n<td style=\"border-bottom: none; padding-left: 15px;\" bgcolor=\"#E8F5E9\">The recently released report&#8230;<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td style=\"border-bottom: none; padding-left: 15px;\" bgcolor=\"#ffebee\">All applicants <strong>who are interested in the job <\/strong>must&#8230;<\/td>\n<td style=\"border-bottom: none; padding-left: 15px;\" bgcolor=\"#E8F5E9\">All job applicants must&#8230;<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td style=\"border-bottom: none; padding-left: 15px;\" bgcolor=\"#ffebee\">The system <strong>that is most efficient and accurate&#8230;<\/strong><\/td>\n<td style=\"border-bottom: none; padding-left: 15px;\" bgcolor=\"#E8F5E9\">The most efficient and accurate system&#8230;<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<\/tbody>\n<\/table>\n<p><span id=\"canned\" class=\"anchor\"><\/span><\/p>\n<div style=\"display: block; text-align: right; margin-top: 0;\"><span class=\"arrowtop\" style=\"font-size: 150%; opacity: 0.5;\"><a href=\"#top\">\u2b06<\/a><\/span><\/div>\n<div style=\"display: inline-block; width: 100%;\">\n<div style=\"font-family: 'Roboto'; font-size: 80%; padding-left: 12px; color: #c198da; letter-spacing: 1px; margin-top: 40px; border-top:3px solid #E0E0E0;\">CONCISENESS STRATEGY #3<\/div>\n<div style=\"border-radius: 5px; background: #f0e6f6; padding: 5px 12px; margin: 0 0 20px;\">\n<div style=\"font-family: 'Roboto Slab'; font-size: 180%; border-bottom: 2px solid #ffffff; padding: 5px 0 8px;\">Avoid Canned Phrases, Bureaucratic-speak, and Business-ese<\/div>\n<div style=\"font-family: 'Roboto'; font-size: 110%; font-weight: 300; padding-left: 30px; padding-top: 2px;\">canned phrases are stale and full of filler<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<p>Effective business writing avoids bureaucratic language and phrases that are the hallmark of decoration. Decoration is a reflection of ritual, and ritual has its role. If you are the student body president and want to make a resolution declaring October 15th &#8220;FAU Founder&#8217;s Day&#8221; in honor of Tom Fleming, you might the declaration with \u201cWhereas\u201d because of the document&#8217;s ritual importance. Similarly, if you are writing a legal document, tradition calls for certain standard phrases such as <a href=\"http:\/\/www.adamsdrafting.com\/know-all-men-by-these-presents\/\" target=\"_blank\">\u201cknow all men by these presents.\u201d<\/a><\/p>\n<p>However, in standard business writing, it is best to refrain from using bureaucratic phrases and ritualistic words that decorate and distract the reader from your clear, essential meaning. If the customer, client, or supplier does not understand the message the first time, each follow-up attempt to clarify costs time, money, and effort.<\/p>\n<table style=\"margin: 0 auto;\" border=\"0\" width=\"90%\" cellspacing=\"0\" cellpadding=\"3\" align=\"center\">\n<tbody>\n<tr>\n<td style=\"text-align: left;\" width=\"35%\"><span style=\"font-size: 130%; font-weight: 300;\">Bureaucratic (Canned) Phrase<\/span><\/td>\n<td style=\"text-align: left;\" width=\"65%\"><span style=\"font-size: 130%; font-weight: 300;\">Plain English Alternative<\/span><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td style=\"padding-left: 30px;\" width=\"35%\">At the present time<\/td>\n<td style=\"padding-left: 30px;\" width=\"65%\">Now, today<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td style=\"padding-left: 30px;\" width=\"35%\">Concerning the matter of<\/td>\n<td style=\"padding-left: 30px;\" width=\"65%\">Regarding, about<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td style=\"padding-left: 30px;\" width=\"35%\">Despite the fact that<\/td>\n<td style=\"padding-left: 30px;\" width=\"65%\">Although, while, even though<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td style=\"padding-left: 30px;\" width=\"35%\">Due to the fact that<\/td>\n<td style=\"padding-left: 30px;\" width=\"65%\">Because, since, as<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td style=\"padding-left: 30px;\" width=\"35%\">Implement an investigation of<\/td>\n<td style=\"padding-left: 30px;\" width=\"65%\">Find out, investigate<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td style=\"padding-left: 30px;\" width=\"35%\">Inasmuch as<\/td>\n<td style=\"padding-left: 30px;\" width=\"65%\">Because, since, as<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td style=\"padding-left: 30px;\" width=\"35%\">It has been suggested<\/td>\n<td style=\"padding-left: 30px;\" width=\"65%\">[name of person or organization] has suggested, said, or stated<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td style=\"padding-left: 30px;\" width=\"35%\">It is believed that<\/td>\n<td style=\"padding-left: 30px;\" width=\"65%\">[name of person or organization] believes, thinks, or says that<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td style=\"padding-left: 30px;\" width=\"35%\">It is the opinion of the author<\/td>\n<td style=\"padding-left: 30px;\" width=\"65%\">I believe, I think, in my opinion<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td style=\"padding-left: 30px;\" width=\"35%\">Until such time as<\/td>\n<td style=\"padding-left: 30px;\" width=\"65%\">Until, when<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td style=\"padding-left: 30px;\" width=\"35%\">With the exception of<\/td>\n<td style=\"padding-left: 30px;\" width=\"65%\">Except, apart from<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<\/tbody>\n<\/table>\n<p><span id=\"starters\" class=\"anchor\"><\/span><\/p>\n<div style=\"display: block; text-align: right; margin-top: 5px;\"><span class=\"arrowtop\" style=\"font-size: 150%; opacity: 0.5;\"><a href=\"#top\">\u2b06<\/a><\/span><\/div>\n<div style=\"display: inline-block; width: 100%;\">\n<div style=\"font-family: 'Roboto'; font-size: 80%; padding-left: 12px; color: #9FA8DA; letter-spacing: 1px; margin-top: 40px; border-top:3px solid #E0E0E0;\">CONCISENESS STRATEGY #4<\/div>\n<div style=\"border-radius: 5px; background: #E8EAF6; padding: 5px 12px; margin: 0 0 20px;\">\n<div style=\"font-family: 'Roboto Slab'; font-size: 180%; border-bottom: 2px solid #ffffff; padding: 5px 0 8px;\">Eliminate Unnecessary Sentence Starters &amp; Clause Starters<\/div>\n<div style=\"font-family: 'Roboto'; font-size: 110%; font-weight: 300; padding-left: 30px; padding-top: 2px;\">get rid of <em>&#8220;it is&#8221;<\/em> and <em>&#8220;there is\/are&#8221;<\/em><\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<p>Avoid weak sentence starters <em><strong>it + be-verb<\/strong><\/em> (it is, it was) and <em><strong>there + be-verb<\/strong><\/em> (there is, there was, there were.) In most cases, you can create a more concise sentence by replacing weak sentence starters with the subject of the sentence.<\/p>\n<table style=\"border-collapse: separate; width: 96%; margin: -0.8em auto 15px;\" border=\"0\" cellspacing=\"10\" align=\"center\">\n<tbody>\n<tr>\n<td style=\"width: 50%; border-bottom: none; text-align: center; font-size: 130%; font-weight: 300; padding: 0;\">WORDY<\/td>\n<td style=\"width: 50%; border-bottom: none; text-align: center; font-size: 130%; font-weight: 300; padding: 0;\">CONCISE<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td style=\"border-bottom: none; padding-left: 15px;\" bgcolor=\"#ffebee\"><strong>It is<\/strong> the governor who signs or vetoes bills.<\/td>\n<td style=\"border-bottom: none; padding-left: 15px;\" bgcolor=\"#E8F5E9\">The governor signs or vetoes bills.<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td style=\"border-bottom: none; padding-left: 15px;\" bgcolor=\"#ffebee\"><strong>It is<\/strong> the truth that will prevail, he argued.<\/td>\n<td style=\"border-bottom: none; padding-left: 15px;\" bgcolor=\"#E8F5E9\">The truth will prevail, he argued.<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td style=\"border-bottom: none; padding-left: 15px;\" bgcolor=\"#ffebee\"><strong>There are<\/strong> four rules that should be observed. They are \u2026<\/td>\n<td style=\"border-bottom: none; padding-left: 15px;\" bgcolor=\"#E8F5E9\">The four rules we should observe are\u2026<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td style=\"border-bottom: none; padding-left: 15px;\" bgcolor=\"#ffebee\"><strong>There are <\/strong>two volunteers who will help us. They are Mike and Sharon.<\/td>\n<td style=\"border-bottom: none; padding-left: 15px;\" bgcolor=\"#E8F5E9\">The two volunteers are Mike and Sharon.<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td style=\"border-bottom: none; padding-left: 15px;\" bgcolor=\"#ffebee\"><strong>There was<\/strong> a big explosion, which shook the windows, and people ran into the street.<\/td>\n<td style=\"border-bottom: none; padding-left: 15px;\" bgcolor=\"#E8F5E9\">A big explosion shook the windows, and people ran into the street.<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<\/tbody>\n<\/table>\n<div class=\"clear\"><\/div>\n<p>Sometimes there is\/there are can be effective for emphasis in some situations, but don&#8217;t overuse them. Take the following example: &#8220;It is imperative that we find a solution.&#8221; The same meaning could be expressed with this more succinct wording: &#8220;We must find a solution.&#8221; But using the expletive construction allows the writer to emphasize the urgency of the situation by placing the word imperative near the beginning of the sentence, so the version with the expletive may be preferable.<br \/>\n<span id=\"passive\" class=\"anchor\"><\/span><\/p>\n<div style=\"display: block; text-align: right; margin-top: -1em;\"><span class=\"arrowtop\" style=\"font-size: 150%; opacity: 0.5;\"><a href=\"#top\">\u2b06<\/a><\/span><\/div>\n<div style=\"display: inline-block; width: 100%;\">\n<div style=\"font-family: 'Roboto'; font-size: 80%; padding-left: 12px; color: #89cffa; letter-spacing: 1px; margin-top: 40px; border-top:3px solid #E0E0E0;\">CONCISENESS STRATEGY #5<\/div>\n<div style=\"border-radius: 5px; background: #e2f4fe; padding: 5px 12px; margin: 0 0 20px;\">\n<div style=\"font-family: 'Roboto Slab'; font-size: 180%; border-bottom: 2px solid #ffffff; padding: 5px 0 8px;\">Avoid Passive Voice in Positive, Neutral, and Informational Contexts<\/div>\n<div style=\"font-family: 'Roboto'; font-size: 110%; font-weight: 300; padding-left: 30px; padding-top: 2px;\">choose active voice when communicating positive, neutral, and informational messages<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<p>In negative situations or contexts where you need to demphasize responsibility or otherwise employ a reader-centered approach to communication, use passive voice. In positive or neutral situations, generally, you should aim to write in active voice.<\/p>\n<p>In the active voice, the subject of the sentence acts upon something or someone. In the passive voice, the subject is acted upon. Active voice is more direct, easier to understand, and more concise. For more information, see <a href=\"https:\/\/owl.english.purdue.edu\/owl\/owlprint\/539\/\" target=\"_blank\">Purdue University&#8217;s Active and Passive Voice handout<\/a>.<\/p>\n<p id=\"mclean-ch06_s02_s04_p01\">Usually, active voice is more engaging.Which sentence sounds better to you?<\/p>\n<ol type=\"A\">\n<li style=\"padding-bottom: 7px;\">All sales orders are processed daily by Mackenzie.<\/li>\n<li>Mackenzie processes all sales orders daily.<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n<p>Most readers prefer sentence B, but why? You\u2019ll recall that all sentences have a subject and a verb, but you may not have paid much attention to their functions. Let\u2019s look at how the subject and verb function in these two sentences. In sentence A, the subject is \u201cMackenzie,\u201d and the subject is the doer of the action expressed by the verb (processes). In sentence A, the subject is \u201csales orders,\u201d and the subject is the receiver of the action expressed by the verb (are processed). Sentence A is written in active voice\u2014a sentence structure in which the subject carries out the action. Sentence B is written in passive voice\u2014a sentence structure in which the subject receives the action.<\/p>\n<p id=\"mclean-ch06_s02_s04_p03\">Active sentences tend to be shorter, more precise, and easier to understand. This is especially true because passive sentences can be written in ways that do not tell the reader who the doer of the action is. For example, \u201cAll sales orders are processed daily\u201d is a complete and correct sentence in passive voice.<\/p>\n<p id=\"mclean-ch06_s02_s04_p04\">Active voice is the clear choice for a variety of contexts, but not all. When you want to deemphasize the doer of the action, you may write, \u201cTen late arrivals were recorded this month\u201d and not even mention who was late. The passive form doesn\u2019t place blame or credit, so it can be more diplomatic in some contexts. Passive voice allows the writer to avoid personal references or personal pronouns (he, she, they) to create a more objective tone. There are also situations where the doer of the action is unknown, as in \u201cgraffiti was painted on the side of our building last night.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Business communication resources tend to recommend active voice as the preferred style. Still, the styles themselves are not the problem or challenge, but it is how we use them that matters. A skilled business writer will see both styles as options within a range of choices and learn to distinguish when each style is most appropriate to facilitate communication.<\/p>\n<table style=\"border-collapse: separate; width: 96%; margin: -0.8em auto 15px;\" border=\"0\" cellspacing=\"10\" align=\"center\">\n<tbody>\n<tr>\n<td style=\"width: 50%; border-bottom: none; text-align: center; font-size: 130%; font-weight: 300; padding: 0;\">ACTIVE<\/td>\n<td style=\"width: 50%; border-bottom: none; text-align: center; font-size: 130%; font-weight: 300; padding: 0;\">PASSIVE<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td style=\"border-bottom: none; padding-left: 15px;\" valign=\"top\" bgcolor=\"#ffebee\">The report <strong>was approved by the manager.<\/strong><\/td>\n<td style=\"border-bottom: none; padding-left: 15px;\" valign=\"top\" bgcolor=\"#E8F5E9\">The manager approved the report.<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td style=\"border-bottom: none; padding-left: 15px;\" valign=\"top\" bgcolor=\"#ffebee\">Your application <strong>is being reviewed.<\/strong><\/td>\n<td style=\"border-bottom: none; padding-left: 15px;\" valign=\"top\" bgcolor=\"#E8F5E9\">We&#8217;re reviewing your application.<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td style=\"border-bottom: none; padding-left: 15px;\" valign=\"top\" bgcolor=\"#ffebee\">An account <strong>was opened by Ms. Simms.<\/strong><\/td>\n<td style=\"border-bottom: none; padding-left: 15px;\" valign=\"top\" bgcolor=\"#E8F5E9\">Ms. Simms opened an account.<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td style=\"border-bottom: none; padding-left: 15px;\" valign=\"top\" bgcolor=\"#ffebee\">Your figures <strong>were checked by the research department.<\/strong><\/td>\n<td style=\"border-bottom: none; padding-left: 15px;\" valign=\"top\" bgcolor=\"#E8F5E9\">The research department checked your figures.<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<\/tbody>\n<\/table>\n<div style=\"display: block; text-align: right; margin-top: -1em;\"><span class=\"arrowtop\" style=\"font-size: 150%; opacity: 0.5;\"><a href=\"#top\">\u2b06<\/a><\/span><\/div>\n<div style=\"height: 125px;\"><\/div>\n<div style=\"width: 350px; margin: 2px auto;\"><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" style=\"margin: 0px auto;\" src=\"http:\/\/rhetoricandwriting.com\/3213-F15\/cc-fair-use-350px.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"350\" height=\"75\" \/><\/div>\n<div style=\"width: 350px; margin: 2px auto; font-size: 90%; text-align: justify; line-height: 125%;\">Portions of this course material are adapted from and supplemented with materials licensed under <a href=\"http:\/\/creativecommons.org\/licenses\/by-nc-sa\/3.0\/\" target=\"_blank\">CC BY-NC-SA 3.0<\/a> and materials available under 1996 Fair Use Guidelines for Educational Multimedia courtesy of Andy Schmitz&#8217;s Creative Commons Book Archive and the University of Hawai&#8217;i.<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>conciseness strategies: intro | fillers | circumlocutions | canned phrases | sentence starters | passive voice Introduction \/ Overview Unlike some other kinds of writing such as poetry or fiction, business writing is not an opportunity for self-expression. Instead it calls for a fairly conservative and unadorned style. Writing style, also known as voice or <a href='https:\/\/techrhet.com\/3213\/conciseness-strategies-1-5\/' class='excerpt-more'>[&#8230;]<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"parent":0,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","template":"no-sidebars.php","meta":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/techrhet.com\/3213\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/488"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/techrhet.com\/3213\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/techrhet.com\/3213\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/page"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/techrhet.com\/3213\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/techrhet.com\/3213\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=488"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/techrhet.com\/3213\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/488\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1916,"href":"https:\/\/techrhet.com\/3213\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/488\/revisions\/1916"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/techrhet.com\/3213\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=488"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}